Awanthi Vardaraj

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Today I Am Not

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I see you.

Crawling on flesh worn-to-the-bone, bloodied, falling, I see you. Can’t look at yourself in the mirror because you’re sure that the wrongness of the wrong was all you. I see you. Arguing with god in the secret room in your […]

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Toast & Tolerance

There was a time I cared enough to question it, when they said that things would get better. Where is eventually’s address? And are we there yet? Are we there yet? Sitting tracing circles on the smoky windows of memory, […]

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“I can show you this” – A Love Poem

For my boyfriend: There are very few people in the world with whom I can be myself; I don’t have to be all those things I make myself be; Perfect, well-turned-out, mature, diplomatic, laid-back; I can show you raw. I […]

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First Kiss

My swing hangs on my mango tree, and you’ve spent the afternoon here with me; it’s been warm and we’ve got wine and we’ve barely moved. We’ve been talking of travel, you and I, we both know what it’s like […]

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4.20 am at a third floor jazz bar in suburban Mumbai

I worked in Mumbai for a while – and I lived in a hotel suite for some months. It was a very interesting experience. I wrote this poem then, after a night out with a friend. I shouldn’t have worn […]

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Summer 2012

Oh, I detest the summer. One walks around in as little as decently possible while trying to move as little as possible. As the days have been getting hotter and hotter my dreams of escaping this horrible tropical hell and […]

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(In Loving Memory of Colin)

Conscious and Unconscious in Varying Degrees of Time (In loving memory of Colin) They called me when I was sitting staring out the window (and wondering about proliferation) Could have knocked me down with a feather (or anything handy). ‘But […]

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Aung San Suu Kyi

The ties that bind – the daughter of Burma (For Aung San Suu Kyi) Confined only by the letter, millions breathe your spirit every day. Flying free in the shadow of the gun, keeper, mother, leader of a people you […]

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