People are noticing; they are talking about how I am becoming, evolving, growing, into myself; finding things I lost; remembering the person I used to be before I was gone, before I slipped into the abyss.
Before I broke.
When I would giggle too much and for no reason about everything and nothing, and when my eyes were constantly laughing because my soul was free.
When I stepped out into the world feeling absolutely sure of my place in it.
When I moved from minute to minute knowing I was adored.
When I looked into the future and saw only light.
When my subconscious played reel upon reel upon reel of happy possibles as my eyes closed to the world so I woke to the joy of remembering the dance of the still long moments between moments between moments.
When I knew I could do anything, not because, but because.
It was so long ago.
Life got intense, and things became difficult, and living was fraught with pain, and the shards of heartache were too hard to endure, and I preferred instead to shut it all away and build instead.
Moats. Walls. Fortifications.
A lack of bridges.
I was so sure I would never need doors. I was so sure I could forego the bridges. I was so sure I would never let anybody visit.
And then you, wonderful you.
With all the force of a hurricane.
You don’t need bridges. You never use the door.
Stone, rock, brick, mortar, cement.
My old castle lies in ruins at your feet.
We build a new one instead. Together.
And you are putting in bridges that can’t be burned. Doors that can be opened and closed. Windows that let in the light.
Wonderful, wonder-filled, wonderful, you.